The mouthful of a name that Jack Malcolm Thorpe Fleming Churchill carried with him was shortened by history to just “Mad Jack.” The main reason for the change is that he was a borderline psychotic crazy person who didn’t fear death the way most normal people should. Mad Jack spent his time after graduating military college riding his motorcycle around India and learning to play the bagpipes, pretty much because “fuck you” – that’s why.
Many war heroes are afforded mere moments of history’s spotlight. But, Mad Jack Churchill did an insane amount of badass stuff, that we at VK Nagrani are lucky enough to talk about all the cool shit he did over the course of World War II.
1. Entering the War
After he got tired of all that nonsense, he joined up with the famous Manchester Regiment of the British Army so he could get in some quality Nazi killin’ time while the gettin’ was still good. When he got to France, the Blitzkrieg was effectively fucking all kinds of everything up, and the Brits were getting pushed with their backs toward the sea, doing what they could to slow the ever-advancing Kraut army.
Mad Jack had a few ideas up his finely pressed sleeves. He led some guerilla missions and small raids on German supply depots, leading the assault on his motorcycle and armed with only a BOW AND ARROW and his trusty Scottish broadsword, to presumably fuck their shit up Braveheart-style. When a fellow conscript asked him why he didn’t get with the times and put the broadsword away when he went to battle, Mad Jack replied:
“In my opinion, sir, any officer who goes into action without his sword is improperly dressed.”
2. War Hero
Word of Mad Jack’s raids spread throughout the ranks and morale was as at an all-time high. During one such raid, he was shot in the neck, but the Devil wouldn’t take someone so crazy so he sent him back to the only place he loved more than the battlefield – England. He was awarded the Military Cross for Bravery after rescuing a wounded British soldier from German ambush. There weren’t many Nazis around to kill back in civilian life, so Mad Jack got back into the war game again – this time joining an elite unit called the Commandos. He was reportedly unaware of what exactly a Commando was at first, but was all about it – probably because it sounded super intimidating, and that was totally his jam at the time.
3. The Capture of Maaloy Island
Jack was the leader of Number 2 Commando, his own regiment inside the group, and was responsible for taking out artillery batteries on Maaloy Island. After landing an insane amphibious assault on their beaches, he did what most insane people would do, and busted out his bagpipes and played “The March of the Cameron Men,” to get his men all pumped on patriotism and bloodlust. As he neared the front of the line of war, he unslung his sword from its sheath, while wading in knee-deep water and began shouting at the top of his lungs:
Two hours later the island was captured, and the folks back at British High Command received a telegram from the frontlines that read:
Maaloy battery and island captured. Casualties slight. Demolitions in progress. Churchill.
That day he, and 50 of his Number 2 Commandos, took 136 prisoners and caused an unknown amount of casualties. But, knowing how badass this dude was, it was probably a lot.
Stay tuned to the VK Nagrani Blog for more of our Badass Guys Series!